


Letting Go Of Fear

by Alania_Black



Series: 366 fics for 2016 [10]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: EWE, Hogwarts Eighth Year, M/M, Most people lived, Tooth-Rotting Sweetness, What veil of death?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-11
Updated: 2016-01-11
Packaged: 2018-05-13 02:51:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5691859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alania_Black/pseuds/Alania_Black
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Draco learns how to let go of fear.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Letting Go Of Fear

**Author's Note:**

> Day 10 of my attempt to write/post a fic for every day of 2016.
> 
> This is set in their eighth year, post-Battle for Hogwarts. This is also set in my personal AU happy place, in which no one we care about died (which basically means no-one except un-named Aurors and lots of evil Death Eaters). 
> 
> **Series note:**  
>  I am working on writing a fic every day of 2016, so I don't have time to re-edit each piece on the day (I have other things going on as well), however I have a strategy in place for editing the fics so there will be a polished version available soon. In the meantime, I'd appreciate it if you would not comment with typos and suchlike until I've published the edited version.

This is pointless. All this pretending that I hate Harry Potter, pretending that I wish him dead... It is all pointless. I know that one day, my heart will betray me and go to him. I know that one day my body will betray me and touch him. I know that one day my mind will betray me because I know that I will like it, hell, love it, and that nothing I do will change that one desperate thought. I am in love with him. I am fighting a losing battle to stay away from him and it is killing me. Moreover, I no longer remember what it is I am preventing myself from going to him for. 

My family? My mother loves me unconditionally, she wouldn’t care who I fell in love with. Father was broken by the war, the only thing he cares for any more is his family. He would probably applaud my cunning in getting someone who could bring back our family’s power. 

My honor and dignity? They are shattered a little more every day because of my failure to follow my heart. What is it that prevents me from going to him? Fear. I am afraid of Harry Potter. I am afraid that if I go to him, if I allow him to love me, I will have to give a part of myself to him. Give him power over my heart. 

We have always had a passion between us, a blazing passion that is rare and hard to find. We also have a certain amount of power over each other, power to rile, to anger, to arouse each other in a way no one else on this planet can. If we were to change our relationship, take that charged edge and make it sexual, that burning passion would still be there. That is what scares me most. It is so easy to step over that line, from hatred to love. I might not even realize it till it is too late. The depth of the emotion, the passion, is so daunting; I’m not sure whether to be scared or excited by it. All I know is that it’s too much for me. 

“Draco?” Came a soft voice from behind me. I turned around to find, of all people, Potter, staring at me. 

“What do you want, Potter?” I snapped at him. His face dropped, then twisted into annoyance.

“You and I have to work together on this project. Our names are on the list Professor Snape has just put up.” He snapped with a more defiant and angry tone.

Great, this means we’ll be working together outside of class.

* * * * *

We worked well together for the first couple of hours, but eventually Potter got too annoyed by my sniping. After the end of the war, most of the Hogwarts students returned to the fixed and re-opened school to redo the previous year, adding an extra yeargroup to each House. Potter he has been calmer, happier in general, since our return. Possibly because he no longer has the weight of you-know-who hanging over his head. Going home to Sirius Black during the holidays, rather than those horrible Muggles, probably helps.

But eventually, even the new, calmer Potter, can only take so much before snapping and storming out. I followed him, but hesitated when he flopped tiredly onto a bench in the courtyard dedicated to the Aurors and members of the Order who died. Hedwig swooped down to join him, as she frequently did, and he finally looked happy and calm as he stroked and soothed her feathers.

* * * * *

He came to a second meeting the next day. I’ve been nicer to him today, and the response has been good. We have worked well together and the research portion of our project has already been finished. He has been more studious since we returned to school, and it shows.

But Potter had to have been doing this deliberately – sitting there across from me and sucking so provocatively on that damned quill. Concentrating so hard on the work that he apparently didn’t notice what he was doing to me – until I gave up hiding, and did what I’ve wanted to do for months. I grabbed Potter, tossed the quill aside, and kissed him.

And he kissed me back.

* * * * *

Ten years on , and that passion is still strong. But now we have so much more - we have a wonderful home. We both have brilliant jobs as Aurors. We have fantastic friends – unfortunately including all of the Weasleys and Granger-Weasley. We have House Elves, although I was more than a little dubious when Harry told me we would be paying Dobby and Winky actual money – they seem to be happier and work better for it. 

And we have three beautiful children together. Our first son, James, unfortunately befriended Fred Weasley’s eldest miscreant and they often get together with Teddy Lupin at Remus’ place to plot – Harry tells me he thinks Remus and Sirius are trying to turn them into the next generation of Marauders, to my eternal terror. Our Lily at least made sensible friends with Pansy Nott’s oldest daughter. Our second son, Scorpius, was born last year within months of the Granger-Weasley’s first child, so no doubt they will soon be fast friends, although I hold out hope that he will at least befriend someone sensible, perhaps a good Ravenclaw like Luna Longbottom’s son.

We’re happy – I’m happy, and so very glad I allowed myself to let go of fear and betray myself in the best way possible. We got that quill framed, it now hangs in our front room, as a reminder:

Let go of fear, grip onto the good things in life and don’t give up without giving a good fight first.


End file.
